Friday, December 7, 2012

Year of change-2012

Year of Change

As the year comes to the end, time for some reflection. This year has been a year of change....change of attitude, change of relationships, change of hearts and change of jobs.And not all change has been good.
My friend tells me that "This all was bound to happen as rahu has entered ur grah ". Earlier I used to reject such things as fiction of imagination, but i told him "Yes, maybe u r right". The roller-coaster I have gone through (and i see it continuing), is not for faint hearted. But I was always a brave heart. Let me clarify I am not very courageous, so I will not challenge the lion in the jungle, but if the lion challenges me, I would give him tough time. This is minute difference, and tats the way I am.
The year started badly, giving me some of the worst times of my life. Pain, they say, one has to go through to be a better person, to be great. And I always wanted to be great, not knowing some pains can be really painful  really unbearable, really difficult.
Why certain relations need to be broken/modified to keep the new relations? Why some new relations compel you to change urself, ur old relations?
I know, no one will have the answers. But its good to ask questions and try to find answers. It helps to utilize ur time.
At one time, things were looking good, and for one moment I thought, I thought maybe it s all going to be set the way I always imagined, I always wanted...
I think (I am note sure of anything these days), I did bend over to make sure things remain the way they are. But then destiny is not written excatly they way we think. And the next moment, it was all gone.... blown up into ashes....flying all over...in front of me, over me.....everywhere....and I was laughing.... laughing at myself... what a fool I was.... thinking ... hahaha.... wat a fool.....
Trying to figure out wat I can do, there came an idea, lets try and change the place.... new place, new job, new envitonment, might work it out.
So switched countires, dressing sense, accent and wat not.... but still .... the pain remains as it is....
I wont forget u 2012, never.